package llm // InsultExpansionV3 - ROUND 3: Kubernetes, Terraform/Cloud, AI/ML, and HTTP/API insults // Because DevOps and ML disasters deserve their own category var InsultExpansionV3 = map[string][]string{ // ==================== KUBERNETES (45 insults) ==================== "kubernetes": { // Pod failures "CrashLoopBackOff: when even the cluster gives up on you.", "Pod evicted: your code wasn't paying rent in the cluster.", "ImagePullBackOff: Docker Hub is ghosting you today.", "OOMKilled: your memory management is the real disaster here.", "Pod pending forever: even Kubernetes can't figure out your mess.", "Container terminated: the only sensible exit strategy.", "Init container failed: couldn't even start failing properly.", "Liveness probe failed: your pod is dead, just like your skills.", "Readiness probe failed: your app wasn't ready. Neither are you.", "Your pod is restarting more than your failed relationships.", // Deployment disasters "Deployment rollback triggered: even Kubernetes wants to undo you.", "ReplicaSet can't scale: your code doesn't scale either.", "Rolling update stuck: stuck like your career.", "kubectl apply failed: YAML isn't that hard. For most people.", "HPA gave up: your app can't handle success anyway.", "PodDisruptionBudget violated: budget for disaster was exceeded.", "Your deployment strategy is 'recreate everything and pray.'", "Surge capacity exceeded: your mistakes surge faster than your pods.", "Deployment deadline exceeded: deadline for competence also passed.", "Your rollout is rolling back faster than your resume updates.", // Resource issues "ResourceQuota exceeded: you exceeded the incompetence quota too.", "CPU throttled: your code efficiency matches your brain efficiency.", "Memory limit reached: should have limited your ambitions instead.", "PersistentVolumeClaim pending: your claims to skill are also pending.", "StorageClass not found: class 'Competent Developer' also not found.", "No nodes available: nodes are hiding from your workload.", "Insufficient resources: for your pods AND your excuses.", "Node pressure: your code puts pressure on everything it touches.", "Eviction threshold reached: you reached the threshold for employment too.", "Your resource requests are fiction. So is your understanding of k8s.", // Configuration chaos "ConfigMap missing: so is your configuration management skill.", "Secret not found: your incompetence is no secret though.", "RBAC denied: Role-Based Access says you can't access success.", "ServiceAccount error: your account of events is also wrong.", "Namespace not found: you're lost in more ways than one.", "Context switching failed: between k8s clusters AND competence.", "kubeconfig invalid: your config for life is also questionable.", "API server unreachable: like your career goals.", "etcd timeout: your learning also timed out years ago.", "Admission webhook rejected: webhook has better judgment than your hiring manager.", // Networking nightmares "Service unavailable: like your competence.", "Ingress misconfigured: traffic can't find your app. Neither can users.", "NetworkPolicy blocking: blocking your code is actually correct.", "DNS resolution failed: your code can't even find localhost.", "ClusterIP not working: nothing in your cluster works.", }, // ==================== TERRAFORM/CLOUD (35 insults) ==================== "terraform": { // State disasters "terraform destroy: finally doing something useful with your infra.", "State file corrupted: a metaphor for your career trajectory.", "State lock failed: someone else is already fixing your mistakes.", "Drift detected: your code drifted from reality long ago.", "Backend configuration error: your backend knowledge is also in error.", "terraform import failed: can't import competence either.", "State refresh error: refreshing won't fix fundamental problems.", "Remote state not found: your remote chance of success also not found.", "State file too large: like your ego vs your abilities.", "Workspace confusion: you're confused in all workspaces.", // Provider problems "Provider error: even AWS doesn't want to work with you.", "API rate limited: your mistakes exceeded the API's patience.", "Credentials expired: so did your relevance.", "Region not available: neither is your future in DevOps.", "Service quota exceeded: quota for bad decisions also exceeded.", "Provider version mismatch: your version and 'competent' don't match.", "Authentication failed: terraform can tell you're a fraud.", "IAM denied: Identity and Access confirms you shouldn't access anything.", "Resource not found: your resources for learning also not found.", "Provider crashed: looking at your code will do that.", // Resource failures "Resource creation failed: creation of your career also failed.", "Dependency cycle detected: you depend on failure consistently.", "Timeout waiting for resource: still waiting for your skill to deploy.", "Validation failed: your code failed validation. So did your degree.", "Variables undefined: your career path is also undefined.", "Output error: the only output is embarrassment.", "Module not found: 'successful_deployment' module missing.", "Plan failed: your life plan also needs review.", "Apply error: apply this to your resume: 'needs improvement.'", "Destroy failed: can't even destroy properly. Impressive.", // Cloud catastrophes "S3 bucket public: your mistakes are also very public.", "Lambda timeout: your functions fail as slowly as possible.", "EC2 terminated: instance of competence also terminated.", "RDS connection refused: database refused your terrible queries.", "CloudFormation drift: drifting further from employability.", }, // ==================== AI/ML (40 insults) ==================== "ai_ml": { // GPU/CUDA disasters "CUDA out of memory: your model is as bloated as your ego.", "GPU not found: your neural network found nothing either.", "CUDA version mismatch: mismatch between your skills and requirements too.", "cuDNN error: your deep learning is very shallow.", "NCCL error: distributed training can't distribute your incompetence.", "torch.cuda.is_available() returns False, and so does your career.", "GPU utilization 0%: matches your brain utilization.", "OOM killer struck: should have killed your model idea first.", "Driver version incompatible: you're incompatible with success.", "Memory allocation failed: allocate some time for learning basics.", // Training failures "NaN loss: your gradients vanished like your debugging skills.", "Loss not decreasing: your competence isn't increasing either.", "Validation loss exploding: your mistakes also explode exponentially.", "Overfitting to training data: and overfitting to bad practices.", "Underfitting everything: including job requirements.", "Gradient explosion: the only thing exploding is your career.", "Learning rate too high: ambition too high, skill too low.", "Model diverged: diverged from anything resembling ML knowledge.", "Early stopping triggered: should have stopped you earlier.", "Accuracy stuck at 50%: your model learned to flip a coin.", // Model issues "Model too large: compensating for something?", "Model won't load: brain cells also won't load.", "Checkpoint corrupted: your understanding is also corrupted.", "Weights initialization failed: your project was doomed from the start.", "Architecture makes no sense: designed by throwing layers at the wall.", "Batch size too large: bigger isn't always better. Applies to egos too.", "Embedding dimension mismatch: dimensions of your confusion also mismatch.", "Tokenizer error: can't tokenize your excuses.", "Inference failed: your ability to infer solutions also failed.", "Model prediction: always wrong. Like your career choices.", // Data disasters "Dataset not found: your dataset of achievements also empty.", "Data loader crashed: crashed harder than your GPU.", "Label mismatch: your labels and reality don't match.", "Preprocessing failed: pre-thinking also failed.", "Data augmentation broke: augmenting garbage gives more garbage.", "Feature extraction error: can't extract features from nothing.", "Normalization failed: nothing normal about your approach.", "Train/test split leaked: your incompetence also leaked everywhere.", "Class imbalance: your skills are imbalanced too.", "Corrupted samples: sample of your work is also corrupted.", }, // ==================== HTTP/API ERRORS (35 insults) ==================== "http_errors": { // Client errors (4xx) "400 Bad Request: your request is as bad as your code.", "401 Unauthorized: even the API knows you shouldn't be here.", "403 Forbidden: the server has better judgment than your manager.", "404 Not Found: your skills are also not found.", "405 Method Not Allowed: your methods aren't allowed in production either.", "408 Request Timeout: patience for your code also timed out.", "409 Conflict: the only thing consistent about you.", "410 Gone: like your chances of success.", "413 Payload Too Large: your ego is also payload too large.", "415 Unsupported Media Type: your code type is also unsupported.", "418 I'm a Teapot: you're a disaster.", "422 Unprocessable Entity: your code is unprocessable by any brain.", "429 Too Many Requests: slow down, the API isn't your therapist.", "451 Unavailable For Legal Reasons: your code should also be illegal.", // Server errors (5xx) "500 Internal Server Error: you broke the server. Congratulations.", "501 Not Implemented: like your understanding of REST.", "502 Bad Gateway: the server between you and success has crashed.", "503 Service Unavailable: like your competence.", "504 Gateway Timeout: gateway gave up waiting for your code to work.", "505 HTTP Version Not Supported: your version of 'working code' isn't supported.", "507 Insufficient Storage: insufficient storage for all your mistakes.", "508 Loop Detected: you're stuck in a loop of bad decisions.", "511 Network Authentication Required: authenticate your claims to skill first.", // curl/wget specific "curl: Connection refused: server is refusing your advances.", "curl: Could not resolve host: your code can't resolve anything.", "wget: Connection timed out: even wget is tired of waiting.", "SSL certificate problem: your certificate of competence is also invalid.", "Connection reset by peer: peer reviewed your code and reset everything.", "Network unreachable: like your career aspirations.", "curl: (7) Failed to connect: you fail to connect with success too.", "Host not found: hosting your code should also not be found.", "Certificate verification failed: your skills failed verification too.", "Protocol error: you're speaking the wrong protocol. In life too.", "Response too large: larger than your debugging capabilities.", "Malformed response: your understanding is also malformed.", }, // ==================== CLOUD PROVIDER SPECIFIC (25 insults) ==================== "cloud": { // AWS "AWS bill arrived: your wallet just filed for bankruptcy.", "Lambda cold start: your brain also has cold starts.", "S3 access denied: denied like your promotion.", "DynamoDB throttled: your throughput of good ideas is also limited.", "EC2 instance terminated: unlike your employment. For now.", "CloudWatch alarm: alarming how bad this is.", "ECS task failed: task 'be competent' also failed.", "SQS message lost: like your message to the team about testing.", // GCP "GCP quota exceeded: quota for patience also exceeded.", "BigQuery timeout: big questions about your competence too.", "Cloud Functions crashed: function 'write_good_code' not defined.", "GKE cluster error: cluster of mistakes growing.", // Azure "Azure outage: your code causes outages too.", "Blob storage error: blob of errors in your code.", "Azure Functions timeout: functions of your brain also timeout.", "App Service failed: your service to the team has also failed.", // General cloud "Cloud costs: $10,000/month for 'Hello World.'", "Auto-scaling scaled to zero: correct assessment of your value.", "CDN cache miss: your code misses the point entirely.", "Load balancer unhealthy: health check for your code: terminal.", "Database connection pool exhausted: pool of excuses also exhausted.", "Message queue backed up: backed up like your technical debt.", "Container registry error: registering your failures since day one.", "VPC misconfigured: Very Poorly Configured.", "IAM role missing: role 'competent developer' is also missing.", }, } // init registers V3 categories into the lookup system func init() { // V3 categories are automatically available through GetExpandedFallback // which checks InsultExpansionV3 after V2 }