@@ -6258,4 +6258,978 @@ export const roastDatabase = { |
| 6258 | 6258 | "Your hometown's so irrelevant, even COVID skipped it.", |
| 6259 | 6259 | "From there? The place where ambition goes to die and mediocrity thrives.", |
| 6260 | 6260 | ], |
| 6261 | + // AUSTRALIA |
| 6262 | + australia: { |
| 6263 | + generic: [ |
| 6264 | + "Australia? Where everything wants to kill you except the healthcare system.", |
| 6265 | + "From Australia? How's living in Britain's sun-damaged basement?", |
| 6266 | + "Australia: Where 'mate' means friend but everyone's actually trying to fight.", |
| 6267 | + "Oh, Australia? The country that's just a desert surrounded by beaches and bad decisions.", |
| 6268 | + "Australia: Where the wildlife is deadlier than the bogans, barely.", |
| 6269 | + "From Australia? Let me guess, you've said 'cunt' three times in this conversation already.", |
| 6270 | + "Australia: The only country where flip-flops are formal wear and spiders need their own zip code.", |
| 6271 | + "Where 'culture' means BBQ and casual racism disguised as banter.", |
| 6272 | + "Australia: Proof that British criminals make terrible founders.", |
| 6273 | + "From Australia? Your country's biggest export is actors pretending to be American and mining companies destroying the planet.", |
| 6274 | + "Australia: Where the internet is slower than a koala on Xanax.", |
| 6275 | + "The country where 'she'll be right' is national policy.", |
| 6276 | + "Australia: America's friend who's somehow even more racist.", |
| 6277 | + "From Australia? You definitely lost a fight to a bird.", |
| 6278 | + "Australia: Because Britain needed somewhere to put their problems.", |
| 6279 | + ], |
| 6280 | + sydney: [ |
| 6281 | + "Sydney? Where the harbour's beautiful but you can't afford to see it.", |
| 6282 | + "From Sydney? How's that million-dollar shoebox treating you?", |
| 6283 | + "Sydney: Where everyone's either a banker or serving coffee to bankers.", |
| 6284 | + "Oh, Sydney? The city that thinks it's Australian New York but it's really just expensive and racist.", |
| 6285 | + "Sydney: Where the Opera House is the only culture and you've never been inside.", |
| 6286 | + "From Sydney? Let me guess, you live 2 hours from the CBD but still say you're from Sydney.", |
| 6287 | + "Sydney: The only city where lockout laws killed the nightlife to save lives that weren't in danger.", |
| 6288 | + "Where 'affordable' means only $900k for a studio.", |
| 6289 | + "Sydney: Melbourne's cashed-up bogan cousin.", |
| 6290 | + "From Sydney? Your city's biggest achievement is making Melbourne feel superior.", |
| 6291 | + ], |
| 6292 | + melbourne: [ |
| 6293 | + "Melbourne? Where the coffee's pretentious and so is everyone else.", |
| 6294 | + "From Melbourne? How's that European cosplay in the Southern Hemisphere?", |
| 6295 | + "Melbourne: Where everyone's a barista, artist, or lying about being either.", |
| 6296 | + "Oh, Melbourne? The city that's just Portland with worse weather and more smugness.", |
| 6297 | + "Melbourne: Where four seasons in one day is a feature, not a bug.", |
| 6298 | + "From Melbourne? Let me guess, you have opinions about coffee and wear black year-round.", |
| 6299 | + "Melbourne: The only city where laneways are culture and AFL is religion.", |
| 6300 | + "Where 'diversity' means different types of white hipsters.", |
| 6301 | + "Melbourne: Sydney's insecure sibling who went to art school.", |
| 6302 | + "From Melbourne? Your city's biggest achievement is convincing people bad weather builds character.", |
| 6303 | + ], |
| 6304 | + brisbane: [ |
| 6305 | + "Brisbane? Sydney's boring cousin who lives in the suburbs.", |
| 6306 | + "From Brisbane? How's being Australia's most forgettable capital?", |
| 6307 | + "Brisbane: Where it's either flooding or you're praying for rain.", |
| 6308 | + "Oh, Brisbane? The city that's just a big country town with delusions.", |
| 6309 | + "Brisbane: Where everyone's friendly because they're too hot to be angry.", |
| 6310 | + "From Brisbane? Let me guess, you tell people you're on the Gold Coast.", |
| 6311 | + "Brisbane: The only city where XXXX is culture and intelligence.", |
| 6312 | + "Where 'nightlife' ends at 9 PM sharp.", |
| 6313 | + "Brisbane: Proof that being subtropical doesn't make you interesting.", |
| 6314 | + "From Brisbane? Your city's biggest achievement is not being the Gold Coast.", |
| 6315 | + ], |
| 6316 | + perth: [ |
| 6317 | + "Perth? The most isolated city pretending it's not lonely.", |
| 6318 | + "From Perth? How's being closer to Jakarta than Sydney?", |
| 6319 | + "Perth: Where mining money can't buy proximity to civilization.", |
| 6320 | + "Oh, Perth? The city that's just a sandy suburb with skyscrapers.", |
| 6321 | + "Perth: Where everyone's either a miner or spending a miner's money.", |
| 6322 | + "From Perth? Let me guess, you fly to Bali more than the rest of Australia.", |
| 6323 | + "Perth: The only city where 'east coast' is a swear word.", |
| 6324 | + "Where 'culture' means whatever made it across the desert.", |
| 6325 | + "Perth: Proof that money can't overcome geography.", |
| 6326 | + "From Perth? Your city's biggest achievement is having beaches, like every other Australian city.", |
| 6327 | + ], |
| 6328 | + }, |
| 6329 | + |
| 6330 | + // NEW ZEALAND |
| 6331 | + newzealand: { |
| 6332 | + generic: [ |
| 6333 | + "New Zealand? Australia's Canada, but somehow even more irrelevant.", |
| 6334 | + "From New Zealand? How's living in Middle Earth's gift shop?", |
| 6335 | + "New Zealand: Where sheep outnumber people and have more interesting lives.", |
| 6336 | + "Oh, New Zealand? The country that's just Australia's shy little brother who went to film school.", |
| 6337 | + "New Zealand: Where everyone's outdoorsy because there's nothing indoors.", |
| 6338 | + "From New Zealand? Let me guess, you're explaining you're not Australian for the thousandth time.", |
| 6339 | + "New Zealand: The only country where being left off maps is a personality trait.", |
| 6340 | + "Where 'culture' means rugby and pretending you're not just Britain's other island.", |
| 6341 | + "New Zealand: Proof that being beautiful doesn't mean being important.", |
| 6342 | + "From New Zealand? Your country's biggest export is people to Australia and movies about walking.", |
| 6343 | + "New Zealand: Where 'Hobbiton' is an actual place adults visit unironically.", |
| 6344 | + "The country where earthquakes are the most exciting thing that happens.", |
| 6345 | + "New Zealand: COVID's teacher's pet who nobody likes anymore.", |
| 6346 | + "From New Zealand? You definitely have a complex about Australia.", |
| 6347 | + "New Zealand: Because Tasmania wasn't isolated enough.", |
| 6348 | + ], |
| 6349 | + auckland: [ |
| 6350 | + "Auckland? Where the house prices are higher than the Sky Tower.", |
| 6351 | + "From Auckland? How's living in the city of sails with no wind in your economy?", |
| 6352 | + "Auckland: Where everyone's either Chinese or complaining about the Chinese.", |
| 6353 | + "Oh, Auckland? The city that's just Sydney for people who couldn't get an Australian visa.", |
| 6354 | + "Auckland: Where traffic is worse than LA but with 1/10th the population.", |
| 6355 | + "From Auckland? Let me guess, you spend your salary on rent and avocados.", |
| 6356 | + "Auckland: The only city where being on an isthmus is its entire personality.", |
| 6357 | + "Where 'culture' means whatever washed up from Australia.", |
| 6358 | + "Auckland: Proof that harbours can't hide housing crises.", |
| 6359 | + "From Auckland? Your city's biggest achievement is making Wellington feel affordable.", |
| 6360 | + ], |
| 6361 | + wellington: [ |
| 6362 | + "Wellington? Where the wind is stronger than the coffee, barely.", |
| 6363 | + "From Wellington? How's living in a capital that feels like a university town?", |
| 6364 | + "Wellington: Where everyone's a civil servant or pretending to be creative.", |
| 6365 | + "Oh, Wellington? The city that's just San Francisco if it was boring and windy.", |
| 6366 | + "Wellington: Where earthquake preparedness is a personality trait.", |
| 6367 | + "From Wellington? Let me guess, you work in government and have a film degree.", |
| 6368 | + "Wellington: The only capital where craft beer is considered culture.", |
| 6369 | + "Where 'windy' describes both the weather and the politicians.", |
| 6370 | + "Wellington: Proof that being quirky doesn't make you interesting.", |
| 6371 | + "From Wellington? Your city's biggest achievement is being in Lord of the Rings credits.", |
| 6372 | + ], |
| 6373 | + }, |
| 6374 | + |
| 6375 | + // SOUTH KOREA |
| 6376 | + southkorea: { |
| 6377 | + generic: [ |
| 6378 | + "South Korea? Where plastic surgery is more common than plastic bottles.", |
| 6379 | + "From South Korea? How's that pressure to be perfect crushing your soul?", |
| 6380 | + "South Korea: Where everyone's either studying for 16 hours or drinking for 16 hours.", |
| 6381 | + "Oh, South Korea? The country that's just a Samsung subsidiary with a flag.", |
| 6382 | + "South Korea: Where K-pop is the only export that isn't a phone or car.", |
| 6383 | + "From South Korea? Let me guess, you're in your 30s and your mom's asking about grandchildren hourly.", |
| 6384 | + "South Korea: The only country where StarCraft is a career and happiness isn't.", |
| 6385 | + "Where 'work-life balance' is a foreign concept, literally.", |
| 6386 | + "South Korea: Proof that economic development doesn't cure societal pressure.", |
| 6387 | + "From South Korea? Your country's biggest export is depressed K-pop stars and phones that explode.", |
| 6388 | + "South Korea: Where the birth rate is lower than the self-esteem.", |
| 6389 | + "The country where everyone looks the same because they go to the same surgeon.", |
| 6390 | + "South Korea: Japan's angrier, less efficient cousin.", |
| 6391 | + "From South Korea? You definitely have a skincare routine longer than your sleep schedule.", |
| 6392 | + "South Korea: Because someone had to make Japan look relaxed.", |
| 6393 | + ], |
| 6394 | + seoul: [ |
| 6395 | + "Seoul? Where the subway is more organized than your life will ever be.", |
| 6396 | + "From Seoul? How's living in a city that never sleeps because it's too busy studying?", |
| 6397 | + "Seoul: Where everyone's competing for everything, including depression.", |
| 6398 | + "Oh, Seoul? The city that's just Tokyo with more plastic surgery and kimchi.", |
| 6399 | + "Seoul: Where the coffee shops outnumber the reasons to live.", |
| 6400 | + "From Seoul? Let me guess, you're in Gangnam pretending you can afford it.", |
| 6401 | + "Seoul: The only city where being average means you've failed at life.", |
| 6402 | + "Where 'nightlife' means studying until 4 AM or drinking until you forget you're studying.", |
| 6403 | + "Seoul: Proof that having fast internet doesn't download happiness.", |
| 6404 | + "From Seoul? Your city's biggest achievement is making other Asian cities look laid-back.", |
| 6405 | + ], |
| 6406 | + busan: [ |
| 6407 | + "Busan? Seoul's beach bum cousin who still lives at home.", |
| 6408 | + "From Busan? How's being Korea's second city that everyone forgets exists?", |
| 6409 | + "Busan: Where the beaches are nice but you're too busy working to see them.", |
| 6410 | + "Oh, Busan? The city that's just trying not to be Seoul and failing.", |
| 6411 | + "Busan: Where everyone's either in shipping or shipped out to Seoul.", |
| 6412 | + "From Busan? Let me guess, you tell people you're from 'near Seoul'.", |
| 6413 | + "Busan: The only city where the fish market is more lively than downtown.", |
| 6414 | + "Where 'culture' means whatever Seoul didn't want.", |
| 6415 | + "Busan: Proof that having beaches doesn't make you California.", |
| 6416 | + "From Busan? Your city's biggest achievement is that zombie movie that made you famous for dying.", |
| 6417 | + ], |
| 6418 | + }, |
| 6419 | + |
| 6420 | + // INDIA |
| 6421 | + india: { |
| 6422 | + generic: [ |
| 6423 | + "India? Where the population is 1.4 billion but personal space is zero.", |
| 6424 | + "From India? How's that superpower by 2020 thing working out?", |
| 6425 | + "India: Where everyone's an engineer, doctor, or disappointing their parents.", |
| 6426 | + "Oh, India? The country where cows have more rights than women.", |
| 6427 | + "India: Where 'diversity' means 500 ways to be divided by caste, religion, and language.", |
| 6428 | + "From India? Let me guess, you work in IT or a call center pretending to be Steve from Texas.", |
| 6429 | + "India: The only country where honking is a language and traffic rules are suggestions.", |
| 6430 | + "Where 'spicy' means your tongue files for divorce.", |
| 6431 | + "India: Proof that having a space program doesn't mean having toilets.", |
| 6432 | + "From India? Your country's biggest export is engineers and YouTube tutorial guys.", |
| 6433 | + "India: Where arranged marriage works better than the arranged government.", |
| 6434 | + "The country where 'Indian Standard Time' means add 30 minutes and a prayer.", |
| 6435 | + "India: Where everyone's vegetarian until they're not.", |
| 6436 | + "From India? You definitely have an uncle in New Jersey and opinions about Pakistan.", |
| 6437 | + "India: Because someone had to make China's population look manageable.", |
| 6438 | + ], |
| 6439 | + mumbai: [ |
| 6440 | + "Mumbai? Where dreams come to die in traffic.", |
| 6441 | + "From Mumbai? How's living in a city where slums have better views than apartments?", |
| 6442 | + "Mumbai: Where everyone's a struggling actor or struggling without acting.", |
| 6443 | + "Oh, Mumbai? The city that's just LA if LA was built on a swamp.", |
| 6444 | + "Mumbai: Where local trains carry more people than the population of small countries.", |
| 6445 | + "From Mumbai? Let me guess, you live in the suburbs but say 'Mumbai'.", |
| 6446 | + "Mumbai: The only city where 'fast' refers to religious observance, not traffic.", |
| 6447 | + "Where 'Bollywood' dreams meet slumdog reality.", |
| 6448 | + "Mumbai: Proof that being the financial capital doesn't mean financial equality.", |
| 6449 | + "From Mumbai? Your city's biggest achievement is functioning despite itself.", |
| 6450 | + ], |
| 6451 | + delhi: [ |
| 6452 | + "Delhi? Where the air is spicier than the food.", |
| 6453 | + "From Delhi? How's that lung cancer via breathing?", |
| 6454 | + "Delhi: Where everyone's either powerful or pretending to be.", |
| 6455 | + "Oh, Delhi? The capital where breathing is a form of slow suicide.", |
| 6456 | + "Delhi: Where metro is the only thing that works on time.", |
| 6457 | + "From Delhi? Let me guess, you name-drop connections you don't have.", |
| 6458 | + "Delhi: The only capital where rape makes more headlines than politics.", |
| 6459 | + "Where 'culture' means arguing about which Delhi is real Delhi.", |
| 6460 | + "Delhi: Proof that being the capital doesn't mean being civilized.", |
| 6461 | + "From Delhi? Your city's biggest export is pollution and attitude problems.", |
| 6462 | + ], |
| 6463 | + bangalore: [ |
| 6464 | + "Bangalore? Where techies killed what was once a garden city.", |
| 6465 | + "From Bangalore? How's that 4-hour commute to go 10 kilometers?", |
| 6466 | + "Bangalore: Where everyone's in IT but the infrastructure isn't.", |
| 6467 | + "Oh, Bangalore? The city that's just San Francisco minus everything good.", |
| 6468 | + "Bangalore: Where the weather was perfect until the traffic made it hell.", |
| 6469 | + "From Bangalore? Let me guess, you're in a startup that's definitely changing the world.", |
| 6470 | + "Bangalore: The only city where pubs close at 11 PM but traffic never sleeps.", |
| 6471 | + "Where 'cosmopolitan' means North Indians and South Indians hate each other equally.", |
| 6472 | + "Bangalore: Proof that IT money can't fix city planning.", |
| 6473 | + "From Bangalore? Your city's biggest achievement is ruining what was once beautiful.", |
| 6474 | + ], |
| 6475 | + kolkata: [ |
| 6476 | + "Kolkata? Where the past is more alive than the economy.", |
| 6477 | + "From Kolkata? How's living in India's communist museum?", |
| 6478 | + "Kolkata: Where everyone's an intellectual but nobody's employed.", |
| 6479 | + "Oh, Kolkata? The city that peaked when it was Calcutta.", |
| 6480 | + "Kolkata: Where strikes are more common than progress.", |
| 6481 | + "From Kolkata? Let me guess, you're debating politics at a tea stall.", |
| 6482 | + "Kolkata: The only city where nostalgia is the main industry.", |
| 6483 | + "Where 'culture' means whatever the British left behind.", |
| 6484 | + "Kolkata: Proof that being cultured doesn't pay bills.", |
| 6485 | + "From Kolkata? Your city's biggest export is intellectuals fleeing to Bangalore.", |
| 6486 | + ], |
| 6487 | + chennai: [ |
| 6488 | + "Chennai? Where the heat and conservatism compete to suffocate you.", |
| 6489 | + "From Chennai? How's living in India's most judgmental sauna?", |
| 6490 | + "Chennai: Where everyone's an engineer because creativity melted in the heat.", |
| 6491 | + "Oh, Chennai? The city that's just Bangalore without the nightlife or weather.", |
| 6492 | + "Chennai: Where speaking Hindi is more controversial than the heat.", |
| 6493 | + "From Chennai? Let me guess, you're explaining it's not Madras anymore.", |
| 6494 | + "Chennai: The only city where December is 'winter' at 30°C.", |
| 6495 | + "Where 'culture' means classical music nobody under 60 enjoys.", |
| 6496 | + "Chennai: Proof that beaches can't cool down hot heads.", |
| 6497 | + "From Chennai? Your city's biggest achievement is making Mumbai's weather look pleasant.", |
| 6498 | + ], |
| 6499 | + hyderabad: [ |
| 6500 | + "Hyderabad? Where the biryani is better than the infrastructure.", |
| 6501 | + "From Hyderabad? How's living in Bangalore's less successful twin?", |
| 6502 | + "Hyderabad: Where everyone's in IT or eating biryani, sometimes both.", |
| 6503 | + "Oh, Hyderabad? The city that can't decide if it's Telangana or Andhra.", |
| 6504 | + "Hyderabad: Where the pearls are fake but the traffic is real.", |
| 6505 | + "From Hyderabad? Let me guess, you work in HITEC City and hate the commute.", |
| 6506 | + "Hyderabad: The only city where Charminar is more stable than the government.", |
| 6507 | + "Where 'development' means another IT park in the middle of nowhere.", |
| 6508 | + "Hyderabad: Proof that good food can't fix bad planning.", |
| 6509 | + "From Hyderabad? Your city's biggest export is techies moving to the US.", |
| 6510 | + ], |
| 6511 | + }, |
| 6512 | + |
| 6513 | + // CHINA |
| 6514 | + china: { |
| 6515 | + generic: [ |
| 6516 | + "China? Where 1.4 billion people pretend to agree with everything.", |
| 6517 | + "From China? How's that social credit score affecting your ability to complain?", |
| 6518 | + "China: Where the Great Wall is less restrictive than the Great Firewall.", |
| 6519 | + "Oh, China? The country that's just a factory with a flag.", |
| 6520 | + "China: Where innovation means copying but faster.", |
| 6521 | + "From China? Let me guess, you're using a VPN to read this.", |
| 6522 | + "China: The only country where Winnie the Pooh is a political dissident.", |
| 6523 | + "Where 'Made in China' means it'll break before the warranty you don't have.", |
| 6524 | + "China: Proof that economic growth doesn't require human rights.", |
| 6525 | + "From China? Your country's biggest export is everything and surveillance technology.", |
| 6526 | + "China: Where the air quality and government transparency compete for who's worse.", |
| 6527 | + "The country where 5000 years of history is used to justify 50 years of mistakes.", |
| 6528 | + "China: Where everyone's an only child or illegally not.", |
| 6529 | + "From China? You definitely can't say what you really think about this.", |
| 6530 | + "China: Because someone had to make 1984 look like a documentary.", |
| 6531 | + ], |
| 6532 | + beijing: [ |
| 6533 | + "Beijing? Where the air is thicker than the Great Wall.", |
| 6534 | + "From Beijing? How's living in a city where breathing is a luxury?", |
| 6535 | + "Beijing: Where history meets pollution in a toxic embrace.", |
| 6536 | + "Oh, Beijing? The capital where you can chew the air.", |
| 6537 | + "Beijing: Where everyone's watching everyone, especially the government.", |
| 6538 | + "From Beijing? Let me guess, you check air quality like weather.", |
| 6539 | + "Beijing: The only capital where face masks were fashionable before COVID.", |
| 6540 | + "Where 'blue sky' days are so rare they make the news.", |
| 6541 | + "Beijing: Proof that being the capital doesn't mean being livable.", |
| 6542 | + "From Beijing? Your city's biggest achievement is making LA's smog look refreshing.", |
| 6543 | + ], |
| 6544 | + shanghai: [ |
| 6545 | + "Shanghai? Where the future was built on swampland and it shows.", |
| 6546 | + "From Shanghai? How's living in China's wannabe New York?", |
| 6547 | + "Shanghai: Where everyone's rich on paper but can't afford reality.", |
| 6548 | + "Oh, Shanghai? The city that's just capitalism with Chinese characteristics.", |
| 6549 | + "Shanghai: Where the skyline is impressive but the air is oppressive.", |
| 6550 | + "From Shanghai? Let me guess, you're in finance or faking it.", |
| 6551 | + "Shanghai: The only city where expats complain in every language.", |
| 6552 | + "Where 'culture' is whatever wasn't demolished for skyscrapers.", |
| 6553 | + "Shanghai: Proof that money can't buy breathable air.", |
| 6554 | + "From Shanghai? Your city's biggest achievement is convincing people it's cosmopolitan.", |
| 6555 | + ], |
| 6556 | + shenzhen: [ |
| 6557 | + "Shenzhen? Where iPhones are born and dreams go to die.", |
| 6558 | + "From Shenzhen? How's living in China's factory with a skyline?", |
| 6559 | + "Shenzhen: Where everyone's 30 because the city didn't exist before them.", |
| 6560 | + "Oh, Shenzhen? The city that's just Hong Kong's mainland knockoff.", |
| 6561 | + "Shenzhen: Where innovation means copying faster than anyone else.", |
| 6562 | + "From Shenzhen? Let me guess, you're in tech or manufacturing tech.", |
| 6563 | + "Shenzhen: The only city where 'history' means last Tuesday.", |
| 6564 | + "Where 'culture' is whatever you can build in 40 years.", |
| 6565 | + "Shenzhen: Proof that cities can be successful and soulless.", |
| 6566 | + "From Shenzhen? Your city's biggest achievement is making other Chinese cities look historic.", |
| 6567 | + ], |
| 6568 | + guangzhou: [ |
| 6569 | + "Guangzhou? Where the dim sum is good but the air is dim.", |
| 6570 | + "From Guangzhou? How's living in China's sweaty armpit?", |
| 6571 | + "Guangzhou: Where everyone's trading something, legally or otherwise.", |
| 6572 | + "Oh, Guangzhou? The city that's just Hong Kong's ugly mainland cousin.", |
| 6573 | + "Guangzhou: Where the Canton Fair is the only fair thing.", |
| 6574 | + "From Guangzhou? Let me guess, you're in trade or wondering why you're there.", |
| 6575 | + "Guangzhou: The only city where African immigrants outnumber Western tourists.", |
| 6576 | + "Where 'international' means 'we trade with everyone'.", |
| 6577 | + "Guangzhou: Proof that being a trade hub doesn't make you cultured.", |
| 6578 | + "From Guangzhou? Your city's biggest achievement is being mentioned when people mean Shenzhen.", |
| 6579 | + ], |
| 6580 | + chengdu: [ |
| 6581 | + "Chengdu? Where the pandas have better living conditions than migrant workers.", |
| 6582 | + "From Chengdu? How's living in China's spiciest, laziest city?", |
| 6583 | + "Chengdu: Where everyone's either eating hotpot or recovering from hotpot.", |
| 6584 | + "Oh, Chengdu? The city that's just pandas and Sichuan pepper.", |
| 6585 | + "Chengdu: Where the lifestyle is relaxed because ambition melted in the spice.", |
| 6586 | + "From Chengdu? Let me guess, you're explaining it's not just about pandas.", |
| 6587 | + "Chengdu: The only city where being slow is a cultural identity.", |
| 6588 | + "Where 'tech hub' means the wi-fi works at the tea house.", |
| 6589 | + "Chengdu: Proof that pandas are more productive than locals.", |
| 6590 | + "From Chengdu? Your city's biggest export is panda photos and numb tongues.", |
| 6591 | + ], |
| 6592 | + hangzhou: [ |
| 6593 | + "Hangzhou? Where Jack Ma's ego is bigger than West Lake.", |
| 6594 | + "From Hangzhou? How's living in Alibaba's company town?", |
| 6595 | + "Hangzhou: Where ancient poetry meets modern poverty wages.", |
| 6596 | + "Oh, Hangzhou? The city that's beautiful if you ignore the tech bros.", |
| 6597 | + "Hangzhou: Where everyone works 996 and pretends it's innovative.", |
| 6598 | + "From Hangzhou? Let me guess, you're in e-commerce or e-miserable.", |
| 6599 | + "Hangzhou: The only city where the lake is more genuine than the startups.", |
| 6600 | + "Where 'culture' is whatever Alibaba's campus hasn't absorbed.", |
| 6601 | + "Hangzhou: Proof that natural beauty can't survive tech money.", |
| 6602 | + "From Hangzhou? Your city's biggest achievement is being in poems nobody reads.", |
| 6603 | + ], |
| 6604 | + }, |
| 6605 | + |
| 6606 | + japan: { |
| 6607 | + generic: [ |
| 6608 | + "Japan? Where the suicide rate is higher than Mount Fuji.", |
| 6609 | + "From Japan? How's that work-life balance where life doesn't exist?", |
| 6610 | + "Japan: Where everyone's polite because showing emotion is illegal.", |
| 6611 | + "Oh, Japan? The country that's living in 2050 technologically and 1950 socially.", |
| 6612 | + "Japan: Where vending machines have more variety than career options.", |
| 6613 | + "From Japan? Let me guess, you're overworked, underpaid, and apologizing for it.", |
| 6614 | + "Japan: The only country where death from overwork has its own word.", |
| 6615 | + "Where 'culture' means following rules until you die at your desk.", |
| 6616 | + "Japan: Proof that efficiency and happiness are inversely related.", |
| 6617 | + "From Japan? Your country's biggest export is anime and depression.", |
| 6618 | + "Japan: Where the trains are never late but your life is always behind schedule.", |
| 6619 | + "The country where robots have more personality than salarymen.", |
| 6620 | + "Japan: Where everyone's xenophobic but too polite to say it.", |
| 6621 | + "From Japan? You definitely have a favorite convenience store and no work-life balance.", |
| 6622 | + "Japan: Because someone had to make Korea look relaxed.", |
| 6623 | + ], |
| 6624 | + tokyo: [ |
| 6625 | + "Tokyo? Where personal space is a myth and rent is a nightmare.", |
| 6626 | + "From Tokyo? How's living in a city that's just one big train station?", |
| 6627 | + "Tokyo: Where everyone's polite because they're dead inside.", |
| 6628 | + "Oh, Tokyo? The city where you pay $2000 to live in a closet.", |
| 6629 | + "Tokyo: Where the vending machines have more personality than the people.", |
| 6630 | + "From Tokyo? Let me guess, you're in a job that's slowly killing your soul.", |
| 6631 | + "Tokyo: The only city where suicide is so common it delays trains.", |
| 6632 | + "Where 'culture' means working yourself to death with style.", |
| 6633 | + "Tokyo: Proof that efficiency can't cure loneliness.", |
| 6634 | + "From Tokyo? Your city's biggest achievement is making New York look spacious.", |
| 6635 | + ], |
| 6636 | + osaka: [ |
| 6637 | + "Osaka? Tokyo's louder, less sophisticated cousin.", |
| 6638 | + "From Osaka? How's being Japan's second city with a first-rate complex?", |
| 6639 | + "Osaka: Where everyone's a comedian but nobody's laughing.", |
| 6640 | + "Oh, Osaka? The city that's just Tokyo with worse manners.", |
| 6641 | + "Osaka: Where the food is better but everything else is worse.", |
| 6642 | + "From Osaka? Let me guess, you're explaining how you're different from Tokyo.", |
| 6643 | + "Osaka: The only city where being rude is considered charming.", |
| 6644 | + "Where 'culture' means eating until you can't move.", |
| 6645 | + "Osaka: Proof that being funny doesn't make you important.", |
| 6646 | + "From Osaka? Your city's biggest achievement is making Tokyo look cultured.", |
| 6647 | + ], |
| 6648 | + kyoto: [ |
| 6649 | + "Kyoto? Where tourists outnumber temples and both are everywhere.", |
| 6650 | + "From Kyoto? How's living in Japan's theme park?", |
| 6651 | + "Kyoto: Where tradition is preserved for Instagram.", |
| 6652 | + "Oh, Kyoto? The city that's just a museum with residents.", |
| 6653 | + "Kyoto: Where everyone's either a monk or selling to tourists.", |
| 6654 | + "From Kyoto? Let me guess, you're tired of tourists asking for geisha photos.", |
| 6655 | + "Kyoto: The only city where the past is more profitable than the future.", |
| 6656 | + "Where 'authenticity' costs extra.", |
| 6657 | + "Kyoto: Proof that beauty can be suffocating.", |
| 6658 | + "From Kyoto? Your city's biggest achievement is convincing people old means wise.", |
| 6659 | + ], |
| 6660 | + yokohama: [ |
| 6661 | + "Yokohama? Tokyo's parking lot with a chinatown.", |
| 6662 | + "From Yokohama? How's being Tokyo's forgotten suburb by the sea?", |
| 6663 | + "Yokohama: Where everyone pretends they're not just Greater Tokyo.", |
| 6664 | + "Oh, Yokohama? The city that exists because Tokyo ran out of space.", |
| 6665 | + "Yokohama: Where the ramen museum is the cultural peak.", |
| 6666 | + "From Yokohama? Let me guess, you work in Tokyo but can't afford Tokyo.", |
| 6667 | + "Yokohama: The only city whose identity is 'near Tokyo with a port'.", |
| 6668 | + "Where 'independence' means having your own train line to Tokyo.", |
| 6669 | + "Yokohama: Proof that being huge doesn't mean being important.", |
| 6670 | + "From Yokohama? Your city's biggest achievement is not being absorbed by Tokyo yet.", |
| 6671 | + ], |
| 6672 | + }, |
| 6673 | + |
| 6674 | + // RUSSIA |
| 6675 | + russia: { |
| 6676 | + generic: [ |
| 6677 | + "Russia? Where the vodka flows easier than democracy.", |
| 6678 | + "From Russia? How's that eternal winter matching your government?", |
| 6679 | + "Russia: Where everyone's depressed but too drunk to notice.", |
| 6680 | + "Oh, Russia? The country that's just a gas station with nuclear weapons.", |
| 6681 | + "Russia: Where the history is glorious and the present is inglorious.", |
| 6682 | + "From Russia? Let me guess, you're planning to leave or already drunk.", |
| 6683 | + "Russia: The only country where fatalism is the national philosophy.", |
| 6684 | + "Where 'opposition' means falling out of windows accidentally.", |
| 6685 | + "Russia: Proof that size doesn't matter when everything's frozen.", |
| 6686 | + "From Russia? Your country's biggest export is dashcam videos and hackers.", |
| 6687 | + "Russia: Where the literature is deep because the despair is deeper.", |
| 6688 | + "The country where 'mysterious circumstances' is a leading cause of death.", |
| 6689 | + "Russia: Where everyone's a chess grandmaster or a pawn.", |
| 6690 | + "From Russia? You definitely have a fur hat and trust issues.", |
| 6691 | + "Russia: Because someone had to make Belarus look cheerful.", |
| 6692 | + ], |
| 6693 | + moscow: [ |
| 6694 | + "Moscow? Where the oligarchs are richer than the history.", |
| 6695 | + "From Moscow? How's living in Europe's most expensive authoritarian theme park?", |
| 6696 | + "Moscow: Where everyone's either corrupt or corrupted by proximity.", |
| 6697 | + "Oh, Moscow? The city that's just St. Petersburg with worse architecture and more money.", |
| 6698 | + "Moscow: Where the metro is beautiful because above ground is depressing.", |
| 6699 | + "From Moscow? Let me guess, you're in oil, gas, or depression.", |
| 6700 | + "Moscow: The only capital where the Kremlin walls keep reality out.", |
| 6701 | + "Where 'culture' means whatever Putin approves this week.", |
| 6702 | + "Moscow: Proof that money can't buy taste or democracy.", |
| 6703 | + "From Moscow? Your city's biggest achievement is making other Russian cities look poor.", |
| 6704 | + ], |
| 6705 | + st_petersburg: [ |
| 6706 | + "St. Petersburg? Where the buildings are European but the problems are Russian.", |
| 6707 | + "From St. Petersburg? How's living in Putin's hometown help your career?", |
| 6708 | + "St. Petersburg: Where everyone's cultured but can't afford culture.", |
| 6709 | + "Oh, St. Petersburg? The city that's just Venice if Venice was depressing.", |
| 6710 | + "St. Petersburg: Where white nights can't brighten the political darkness.", |
| 6711 | + "From St. Petersburg? Let me guess, you're an artist starving with style.", |
| 6712 | + "St. Petersburg: The only city where beauty can't mask authoritarian decay.", |
| 6713 | + "Where 'culture' flourishes despite the government's best efforts.", |
| 6714 | + "St. Petersburg: Proof that being beautiful doesn't mean being free.", |
| 6715 | + "From St. Petersburg? Your city's biggest export is nostalgia for when it mattered.", |
| 6716 | + ], |
| 6717 | + novosibirsk: [ |
| 6718 | + "Novosibirsk? Where Siberia's dreams go to freeze.", |
| 6719 | + "From Novosibirsk? How's being Russia's third city that nobody remembers exists?", |
| 6720 | + "Novosibirsk: Where the temperature and morale compete for who's lower.", |
| 6721 | + "Oh, Novosibirsk? The city that's just a train stop that got ambitious.", |
| 6722 | + "Novosibirsk: Where scientists go to disappear into irrelevance.", |
| 6723 | + "From Novosibirsk? Let me guess, you're explaining where in Siberia you are.", |
| 6724 | + "Novosibirsk: The only city where 'culture' means the opera house and depression.", |
| 6725 | + "Where 'development' stopped when the Soviet Union did.", |
| 6726 | + "Novosibirsk: Proof that being big in Siberia means nothing.", |
| 6727 | + "From Novosibirsk? Your city's biggest achievement is having a metro in permafrost.", |
| 6728 | + ], |
| 6729 | + sochi: [ |
| 6730 | + "Sochi? Where Putin's Olympics left debt and empty stadiums.", |
| 6731 | + "From Sochi? How's living in Russia's attempt at having a beach resort?", |
| 6732 | + "Sochi: Where the Black Sea meets white elephants.", |
| 6733 | + "Oh, Sochi? The city that spent billions to host Olympics nobody remembers.", |
| 6734 | + "Sochi: Where oligarchs vacation and locals can't afford to exist.", |
| 6735 | + "From Sochi? Let me guess, you work in tourism or construction corruption.", |
| 6736 | + "Sochi: The only resort where the prices are European but the service is Soviet.", |
| 6737 | + "Where 'legacy' means abandoned Olympic venues.", |
| 6738 | + "Sochi: Proof that hosting Olympics doesn't make you Olympic-worthy.", |
| 6739 | + "From Sochi? Your city's biggest achievement is making Putin feel tropical.", |
| 6740 | + ], |
| 6741 | + }, |
| 6742 | + // TAIWAN |
| 6743 | + taiwan: { |
| 6744 | + generic: [ |
| 6745 | + "Taiwan? The country that exists in diplomatic limbo but makes everyone's semiconductors.", |
| 6746 | + "From Taiwan? How's that eternal 'Are we a country?' debate treating you?", |
| 6747 | + "Taiwan: Where the bubble tea is sweet but the China situation is bitter.", |
| 6748 | + "Oh, Taiwan? The island that's just China's rebellious teenager who moved out.", |
| 6749 | + "Taiwan: Where everyone's preparing for invasion while pretending everything's fine.", |
| 6750 | + "From Taiwan? Let me guess, you work in tech or semiconductors like everyone else.", |
| 6751 | + "Taiwan: The only country where your passport's validity depends on who you ask.", |
| 6752 | + "Where 'independence' is a word you whisper but never declare.", |
| 6753 | + "Taiwan: Proof that making the world's chips doesn't guarantee recognition.", |
| 6754 | + "From Taiwan? Your country's biggest export is computer chips and political awkwardness.", |
| 6755 | + "Taiwan: Where the night markets are more organized than the political status.", |
| 6756 | + "The island where 'One China' means different things to everyone.", |
| 6757 | + "Taiwan: Where everyone's learning English to eventually leave.", |
| 6758 | + "From Taiwan? You definitely have strong opinions about the KMT and DPP.", |
| 6759 | + "Taiwan: Because being actually independent is too mainstream.", |
| 6760 | + ], |
| 6761 | + taipei: [ |
| 6762 | + "Taipei? Where the 101 tower is taller than the political aspirations.", |
| 6763 | + "From Taipei? How's living in a capital that China says isn't a capital?", |
| 6764 | + "Taipei: Where everyone's stressed about China but too polite to panic.", |
| 6765 | + "Oh, Taipei? The city that's just Hong Kong's democratic but boring cousin.", |
| 6766 | + "Taipei: Where the MRT works better than international recognition.", |
| 6767 | + "From Taipei? Let me guess, you work insane hours but still can't afford housing.", |
| 6768 | + "Taipei: The only capital where stinky tofu smells better than the political situation.", |
| 6769 | + "Where 'nightlife' means night markets and KTV until dawn.", |
| 6770 | + "Taipei: Proof that having democracy doesn't mean having allies.", |
| 6771 | + "From Taipei? Your city's biggest achievement is making Hong Kong jealous of your freedom.", |
| 6772 | + ], |
| 6773 | + kaohsiung: [ |
| 6774 | + "Kaohsiung? Taiwan's second city that wishes it was first.", |
| 6775 | + "From Kaohsiung? How's living in Taipei's sweaty industrial cousin?", |
| 6776 | + "Kaohsiung: Where the harbor is busy but the city isn't.", |
| 6777 | + "Oh, Kaohsiung? The city that's just a port with apartments.", |
| 6778 | + "Kaohsiung: Where everyone's either in shipping or shipped out to Taipei.", |
| 6779 | + "From Kaohsiung? Let me guess, you tell people you're from 'southern Taiwan'.", |
| 6780 | + "Kaohsiung: The only city where the love river is neither lovely nor a river.", |
| 6781 | + "Where 'culture' means whatever Taipei didn't want.", |
| 6782 | + "Kaohsiung: Proof that being the largest port doesn't make you important.", |
| 6783 | + "From Kaohsiung? Your city's biggest achievement is having slightly cheaper rent than Taipei.", |
| 6784 | + ], |
| 6785 | + taichung: [ |
| 6786 | + "Taichung? The city that exists because Taiwan needed something between Taipei and Kaohsiung.", |
| 6787 | + "From Taichung? How's living in Taiwan's forgotten middle child?", |
| 6788 | + "Taichung: Where the bubble tea is good but that's about it.", |
| 6789 | + "Oh, Taichung? The city that's just a rest stop with delusions.", |
| 6790 | + "Taichung: Where everyone's either passing through or stuck.", |
| 6791 | + "From Taichung? Let me guess, you're explaining why it's better than people think.", |
| 6792 | + "Taichung: The only city where 'central' location doesn't mean centrally important.", |
| 6793 | + "Where 'attractions' means that colorful village Instagram ruined.", |
| 6794 | + "Taichung: Proof that being in the middle doesn't make you matter.", |
| 6795 | + "From Taichung? Your city's biggest achievement is being equidistant from better places.", |
| 6796 | + ], |
| 6797 | + }, |
| 6798 | + |
| 6799 | + // IRAN |
| 6800 | + iran: { |
| 6801 | + generic: [ |
| 6802 | + "Iran? Where the history is ancient but the government is medieval.", |
| 6803 | + "From Iran? How's that theocracy treating your VPN collection?", |
| 6804 | + "Iran: Where everyone's Persian until the Arabs hear you say that.", |
| 6805 | + "Oh, Iran? The country that went from Persian Empire to Islamic Republic of Instagram VPNs.", |
| 6806 | + "Iran: Where the women are educated but can't show their hair.", |
| 6807 | + "From Iran? Let me guess, you're explaining you're not Arab for the millionth time.", |
| 6808 | + "Iran: The only country where yogurt drinks are more stable than the currency.", |
| 6809 | + "Where 'sanctions' is just another word for Tuesday.", |
| 6810 | + "Iran: Proof that oil wealth can't buy freedom.", |
| 6811 | + "From Iran? Your country's biggest export is pistachios and brain drain to California.", |
| 6812 | + "Iran: Where everyone has a PhD but drives a taxi.", |
| 6813 | + "The country where 'Death to America' is policy but everyone wants a green card.", |
| 6814 | + "Iran: Where the youth are more modern than the mollahs allow.", |
| 6815 | + "From Iran? You definitely have relatives in Los Angeles and opinions about the Shah.", |
| 6816 | + "Iran: Because Persia sounded too free.", |
| 6817 | + ], |
| 6818 | + tehran: [ |
| 6819 | + "Tehran? Where the smog is thicker than the women's mandatory hijabs.", |
| 6820 | + "From Tehran? How's living in a capital where fun is illegal but traffic isn't?", |
| 6821 | + "Tehran: Where everyone's rich in the north and realistic in the south.", |
| 6822 | + "Oh, Tehran? The city that's just Los Angeles if LA was run by clerics.", |
| 6823 | + "Tehran: Where the mountains are beautiful but you can't see them through pollution.", |
| 6824 | + "From Tehran? Let me guess, you party in private and pretend in public.", |
| 6825 | + "Tehran: The only capital where traffic jams last longer than marriages.", |
| 6826 | + "Where 'culture' happens behind closed doors.", |
| 6827 | + "Tehran: Proof that you can't run a modern city with ancient rules.", |
| 6828 | + "From Tehran? Your city's biggest achievement is having Instagram despite it being banned.", |
| 6829 | + ], |
| 6830 | + isfahan: [ |
| 6831 | + "Isfahan? Half the world, but your government wants none of it.", |
| 6832 | + "From Isfahan? How's living in Iran's museum city?", |
| 6833 | + "Isfahan: Where the architecture is stunning but the economy is stunted.", |
| 6834 | + "Oh, Isfahan? The city that peaked 400 years ago.", |
| 6835 | + "Isfahan: Where tourists come for culture and leave with carpets.", |
| 6836 | + "From Isfahan? Let me guess, you're in tourism or handicrafts or both.", |
| 6837 | + "Isfahan: The only city where the bridges are dry because they needed the water.", |
| 6838 | + "Where 'preservation' means keeping buildings, not freedoms.", |
| 6839 | + "Isfahan: Proof that beauty can't overcome bureaucracy.", |
| 6840 | + "From Isfahan? Your city's biggest export is overpriced carpets and UNESCO photos.", |
| 6841 | + ], |
| 6842 | + shiraz: [ |
| 6843 | + "Shiraz? Where the poetry is beautiful but you can't drink the wine.", |
| 6844 | + "From Shiraz? How's living in the city of love where dating is complicated?", |
| 6845 | + "Shiraz: Where Hafez wrote about wine in a country that banned it.", |
| 6846 | + "Oh, Shiraz? The city of poets in a country that jails writers.", |
| 6847 | + "Shiraz: Where everyone quotes poetry but can't speak freely.", |
| 6848 | + "From Shiraz? Let me guess, you're cultured but careful about showing it.", |
| 6849 | + "Shiraz: The only city named after wine where alcohol is illegal.", |
| 6850 | + "Where 'romance' means reading poetry because everything else is haram.", |
| 6851 | + "Shiraz: Proof that having history doesn't mean having freedom.", |
| 6852 | + "From Shiraz? Your city's biggest achievement is making people google 'Persepolis'.", |
| 6853 | + ], |
| 6854 | + }, |
| 6855 | + // IRAQ |
| 6856 | + iraq: { |
| 6857 | + generic: [ |
| 6858 | + "Iraq? Where ancient Babylon meets modern chaos.", |
| 6859 | + "From Iraq? How's that 'liberation' working out two decades later?", |
| 6860 | + "Iraq: Where oil is plentiful but electricity isn't.", |
| 6861 | + "Oh, Iraq? The country that went from cradle of civilization to grave of stability.", |
| 6862 | + "Iraq: Where everyone's tired of being a geopolitical pawn.", |
| 6863 | + "From Iraq? Let me guess, you're explaining which sect you're not.", |
| 6864 | + "Iraq: The only country where ISIS was an improvement on the traffic.", |
| 6865 | + "Where 'reconstruction' has been under construction since 2003.", |
| 6866 | + "Iraq: Proof that regime change doesn't mean positive change.", |
| 6867 | + "From Iraq? Your country's biggest export is oil and refugees.", |
| 6868 | + "Iraq: Where the Tigris and Euphrates meet but the government doesn't.", |
| 6869 | + "The country where 'security' means different things in different neighborhoods.", |
| 6870 | + "Iraq: Where everyone has a generator because the government doesn't generate power.", |
| 6871 | + "From Iraq? You definitely have relatives in Michigan and memories of better times.", |
| 6872 | + "Iraq: Because someone had to test America's foreign policy.", |
| 6873 | + ], |
| 6874 | + baghdad: [ |
| 6875 | + "Baghdad? Where the Green Zone is the only green thing left.", |
| 6876 | + "From Baghdad? How's living in a capital divided by blast walls?", |
| 6877 | + "Baghdad: Where One Thousand and One Nights became one thousand and one explosions.", |
| 6878 | + "Oh, Baghdad? The city that went from House of Wisdom to house of cards.", |
| 6879 | + "Baghdad: Where everyone's a survivor because what's the alternative?", |
| 6880 | + "From Baghdad? Let me guess, you measure distance in checkpoints.", |
| 6881 | + "Baghdad: The only capital where traffic jams save lives from car bombs.", |
| 6882 | + "Where 'nightlife' ended in 2003.", |
| 6883 | + "Baghdad: Proof that history can't protect you from geopolitics.", |
| 6884 | + "From Baghdad? Your city's biggest achievement is still functioning, somehow.", |
| 6885 | + ], |
| 6886 | + basra: [ |
| 6887 | + "Basra? Where the oil is rich but the people aren't.", |
| 6888 | + "From Basra? How's living in Iraq's sweaty, neglected south?", |
| 6889 | + "Basra: Where the temperature and tempers run equally hot.", |
| 6890 | + "Oh, Basra? The city that's Venice if Venice was burning.", |
| 6891 | + "Basra: Where everyone works in oil but can't afford fuel.", |
| 6892 | + "From Basra? Let me guess, you're protesting about water or electricity.", |
| 6893 | + "Basra: The only city where the port works better than the government.", |
| 6894 | + "Where 'development' means another oil contract for foreign companies.", |
| 6895 | + "Basra: Proof that sitting on oil doesn't mean sitting pretty.", |
| 6896 | + "From Basra? Your city's biggest export is oil and anger about where oil money goes.", |
| 6897 | + ], |
| 6898 | + erbil: [ |
| 6899 | + "Erbil? Where Kurdistan dreams of independence but settles for autonomy.", |
| 6900 | + "From Erbil? How's being the capital of a country that doesn't exist?", |
| 6901 | + "Erbil: Where everyone's Kurdish first and Iraqi when convenient.", |
| 6902 | + "Oh, Erbil? The city that's just Baghdad's more stable, less recognized cousin.", |
| 6903 | + "Erbil: Where the citadel is ancient but the independence movement isn't.", |
| 6904 | + "From Erbil? Let me guess, you're explaining Kurdish isn't Arabic.", |
| 6905 | + "Erbil: The only city where the flag depends on who's asking.", |
| 6906 | + "Where 'progress' is relative to how bad Baghdad is doing.", |
| 6907 | + "Erbil: Proof that being better doesn't mean being independent.", |
| 6908 | + "From Erbil? Your city's biggest achievement is making Iraq look dysfunctional by comparison.", |
| 6909 | + ], |
| 6910 | + }, |
| 6911 | + // KAZAKHSTAN |
| 6912 | + kazakhstan: { |
| 6913 | + generic: [ |
| 6914 | + "Kazakhstan? Where Borat is still the most famous thing about you.", |
| 6915 | + "From Kazakhstan? How's being Russia's parking lot with oil?", |
| 6916 | + "Kazakhstan: Where the steppe is empty and so are the promises.", |
| 6917 | + "Oh, Kazakhstan? The country that's just Russia's khaki-colored annex.", |
| 6918 | + "Kazakhstan: Where everyone's either in oil or wondering why they're there.", |
| 6919 | + "From Kazakhstan? Let me guess, you're tired of Borat jokes but have no better material.", |
| 6920 | + "Kazakhstan: The only country where the capital moved because the president was bored.", |
| 6921 | + "Where 'diversity' means Russians and Kazakhs tolerating each other.", |
| 6922 | + "Kazakhstan: Proof that being huge doesn't mean being important.", |
| 6923 | + "From Kazakhstan? Your country's biggest export is oil and potassium jokes.", |
| 6924 | + "Kazakhstan: Where the horses have more culture than the cities.", |
| 6925 | + "The country where corruption is so normal it's basically tradition.", |
| 6926 | + "Kazakhstan: Where everyone's name ends in -ov but they swear they're not Russian.", |
| 6927 | + "From Kazakhstan? You definitely have strong opinions about Nazarbayev.", |
| 6928 | + "Kazakhstan: Because someone had to make Mongolia look densely populated.", |
| 6929 | + ], |
| 6930 | + almaty: [ |
| 6931 | + "Almaty? The real capital that got demoted for being too interesting.", |
| 6932 | + "From Almaty? How's living in Kazakhstan's only city with a pulse?", |
| 6933 | + "Almaty: Where the mountains are beautiful but the air isn't.", |
| 6934 | + "Oh, Almaty? The city that's just Moscow's central Asian franchise.", |
| 6935 | + "Almaty: Where everyone's either a student or corrupt, sometimes both.", |
| 6936 | + "From Almaty? Let me guess, you miss being the capital.", |
| 6937 | + "Almaty: The only city where apples are famous because nothing else is.", |
| 6938 | + "Where 'culture' means whatever survived Sovietization.", |
| 6939 | + "Almaty: Proof that being the biggest doesn't mean being the capital.", |
| 6940 | + "From Almaty? Your city's biggest achievement is having mountains nearby.", |
| 6941 | + ], |
| 6942 | + nur_sultan: [ |
| 6943 | + "Nur-Sultan? The capital that changes names more than a spy.", |
| 6944 | + "From Nur-Sultan? How's living in a city designed by a dictator's fever dream?", |
| 6945 | + "Nur-Sultan: Where the architecture is futuristic but the politics are ancient.", |
| 6946 | + "Oh, Nur-Sultan? The city that's just Astana with a personality cult.", |
| 6947 | + "Nur-Sultan: Where it's -40° and the buildings look like they're melting.", |
| 6948 | + "From Nur-Sultan? Let me guess, you work for the government or wonder why you're there.", |
| 6949 | + "Nur-Sultan: The only capital built to prove a point nobody understands.", |
| 6950 | + "Where 'urban planning' means whatever Nazarbayev dreamed up.", |
| 6951 | + "Nur-Sultan: Proof that you can build a capital but not a soul.", |
| 6952 | + "From Nur-Sultan? Your city's biggest achievement is confusing map makers with name changes.", |
| 6953 | + ], |
| 6954 | + }, |
| 6955 | + |
| 6956 | + // UZBEKISTAN |
| 6957 | + uzbekistan: { |
| 6958 | + generic: [ |
| 6959 | + "Uzbekistan? Where the Silk Road ended and progress stopped.", |
| 6960 | + "From Uzbekistan? How's that post-Soviet hangover treating you?", |
| 6961 | + "Uzbekistan: Where cotton is king and workers are serfs.", |
| 6962 | + "Oh, Uzbekistan? The country that's just Borat's less famous neighbor.", |
| 6963 | + "Uzbekistan: Where everyone's name ends in -ov but the government begins with corruption.", |
| 6964 | + "From Uzbekistan? Let me guess, you're in cotton or trying to leave.", |
| 6965 | + "Uzbekistan: The only country where the architecture is better than the government.", |
| 6966 | + "Where 'reform' means the dictator's son is slightly less terrible.", |
| 6967 | + "Uzbekistan: Proof that being on the Silk Road doesn't mean you're going anywhere.", |
| 6968 | + "From Uzbekistan? Your country's biggest export is cotton picked by forced labor.", |
| 6969 | + "Uzbekistan: Where the desert is less dry than the economy.", |
| 6970 | + "The country where tourism means showing off buildings from when you mattered.", |
| 6971 | + "Uzbekistan: Where everyone's Muslim but the vodka flows freely.", |
| 6972 | + "From Uzbekistan? You definitely have relatives in Russia sending money back.", |
| 6973 | + "Uzbekistan: Because someone had to make Turkmenistan look progressive.", |
| 6974 | + ], |
| 6975 | + tashkent: [ |
| 6976 | + "Tashkent? Where Soviet concrete meets Central Asian chaos.", |
| 6977 | + "From Tashkent? How's living in the city rebuilt by an earthquake and ruined by planning?", |
| 6978 | + "Tashkent: Where the metro is beautiful because above ground isn't.", |
| 6979 | + "Oh, Tashkent? The city that's just Moscow's forgotten Central Asian office.", |
| 6980 | + "Tashkent: Where everyone's either a bureaucrat or bribing one.", |
| 6981 | + "From Tashkent? Let me guess, you're proud of that metro you can't photograph.", |
| 6982 | + "Tashkent: The only capital where the bazaar is more organized than the government.", |
| 6983 | + "Where 'modern' means Soviet-era apartment blocks.", |
| 6984 | + "Tashkent: Proof that being the biggest city doesn't mean being interesting.", |
| 6985 | + "From Tashkent? Your city's biggest achievement is surviving that 1966 earthquake.", |
| 6986 | + ], |
| 6987 | + samarkand: [ |
| 6988 | + "Samarkand? Where the past is glorious and the present is tourist traps.", |
| 6989 | + "From Samarkand? How's living in a UNESCO site that peaked 600 years ago?", |
| 6990 | + "Samarkand: Where Tamerlane's legacy is taller than current ambitions.", |
| 6991 | + "Oh, Samarkand? The city that's just an outdoor museum with residents.", |
| 6992 | + "Samarkand: Where everyone's either restoring history or selling it.", |
| 6993 | + "From Samarkand? Let me guess, you work in tourism or wish tourists would leave.", |
| 6994 | + "Samarkand: The only city where the dead have better architecture than the living.", |
| 6995 | + "Where 'development' means adding gift shops to historical sites.", |
| 6996 | + "Samarkand: Proof that past glory doesn't pay present bills.", |
| 6997 | + "From Samarkand? Your city's biggest achievement happened before Columbus was born.", |
| 6998 | + ], |
| 6999 | + }, |
| 7000 | + // ROMANIA |
| 7001 | + romania: { |
| 7002 | + generic: [ |
| 7003 | + "Romania? Where Dracula is the most positive representation you have.", |
| 7004 | + "From Romania? How's being Europe's parking lot for cheap labor?", |
| 7005 | + "Romania: Where everyone's a hacker, scammer, or driving a cab in Paris.", |
| 7006 | + "Oh, Romania? The country that's just Moldova's slightly more successful sibling.", |
| 7007 | + "Romania: Where the Internet is fast because reality is too depressing to face.", |
| 7008 | + "From Romania? Let me guess, you're in IT or Germany.", |
| 7009 | + "Romania: The only EU country where horse carts share highways with BMWs.", |
| 7010 | + "Where 'corruption' is so common it's basically culture.", |
| 7011 | + "Romania: Proof that EU membership doesn't cure Post-Communist syndrome.", |
| 7012 | + "From Romania? Your country's biggest export is IT workers and abandoned children.", |
| 7013 | + "Romania: Where everyone claims to be descended from Romans but acts like barbarians.", |
| 7014 | + "The country where stealing is a career path and politics is organized crime.", |
| 7015 | + "Romania: Where the mountains are beautiful but the government is ugly.", |
| 7016 | + "From Romania? You definitely have a relative building houses in Spain.", |
| 7017 | + "Romania: Because someone had to make Bulgaria look good.", |
| 7018 | + ], |
| 7019 | + bucharest: [ |
| 7020 | + "Bucharest? The Paris of the East, if Paris was hit by communism and never recovered.", |
| 7021 | + "From Bucharest? How's living in Europe's most chaotic capital?", |
| 7022 | + "Bucharest: Where Ceaușescu's palace is bigger than the city's prospects.", |
| 7023 | + "Oh, Bucharest? The city that's just concrete and corruption.", |
| 7024 | + "Bucharest: Where everyone drives like they're escaping something.", |
| 7025 | + "From Bucharest? Let me guess, you work in IT and dream of Berlin.", |
| 7026 | + "Bucharest: The only capital where stray dogs had more rights than pedestrians.", |
| 7027 | + "Where 'nightlife' means escaping reality in overpriced clubs.", |
| 7028 | + "Bucharest: Proof that you can destroy a city's soul with concrete.", |
| 7029 | + "From Bucharest? Your city's biggest achievement is having faster internet than dignity.", |
| 7030 | + ], |
| 7031 | + cluj_napoca: [ |
| 7032 | + "Cluj? Where Transylvania's tech scene meets medieval pretensions.", |
| 7033 | + "From Cluj? How's that 'Silicon Valley of Romania' delusion working?", |
| 7034 | + "Cluj: Where students stay because nowhere else in Romania is hiring.", |
| 7035 | + "Oh, Cluj? The city that thinks it's better than Bucharest (it's not).", |
| 7036 | + "Cluj: Where rent prices think they're in Western Europe.", |
| 7037 | + "From Cluj? Let me guess, you're in tech or studying to be in tech.", |
| 7038 | + "Cluj: The only city where Hungarian is spoken more than job opportunities.", |
| 7039 | + "Where 'multicultural' means Romanians and Hungarians barely tolerating each other.", |
| 7040 | + "Cluj: Proof that having universities doesn't create jobs.", |
| 7041 | + "From Cluj? Your city's biggest achievement is convincing companies Romania has a Silicon Valley.", |
| 7042 | + ], |
| 7043 | + }, |
| 7044 | + |
| 7045 | + // BULGARIA |
| 7046 | + bulgaria: { |
| 7047 | + generic: [ |
| 7048 | + "Bulgaria? Where the yogurt has more culture than the people.", |
| 7049 | + "From Bulgaria? How's being Europe's poorest member treating you?", |
| 7050 | + "Bulgaria: Where everyone's a hacker or wishing they could hack their way out.", |
| 7051 | + "Oh, Bulgaria? The country that's just Romania's even poorer cousin.", |
| 7052 | + "Bulgaria: Where the roses are beautiful but everything else is thorny.", |
| 7053 | + "From Bulgaria? Let me guess, you're in Germany or planning the move.", |
| 7054 | + "Bulgaria: The only EU country where the mafia has a political party.", |
| 7055 | + "Where 'development' means another mall in Sofia.", |
| 7056 | + "Bulgaria: Proof that inventing yogurt doesn't sustain an economy.", |
| 7057 | + "From Bulgaria? Your country's biggest export is nurses and nostalgic communists.", |
| 7058 | + "Bulgaria: Where the beaches are nice but the wages are offensive.", |
| 7059 | + "The country where everyone's Orthodox but prays for a German salary.", |
| 7060 | + "Bulgaria: Where the history is rich but the people aren't.", |
| 7061 | + "From Bulgaria? You definitely have a friend who married for an EU passport.", |
| 7062 | + "Bulgaria: Because someone had to be last in the EU rankings.", |
| 7063 | + ], |
| 7064 | + sofia: [ |
| 7065 | + "Sofia? Where the mountains are close but prosperity is distant.", |
| 7066 | + "From Sofia? How's living in the Balkans' most underachieving capital?", |
| 7067 | + "Sofia: Where everyone's either in IT or leaving for IT abroad.", |
| 7068 | + "Oh, Sofia? The city that's just a giant parking problem with a cathedral.", |
| 7069 | + "Sofia: Where the yellow bricks lead to nowhere.", |
| 7070 | + "From Sofia? Let me guess, you complain about corruption while paying bribes.", |
| 7071 | + "Sofia: The only capital where Roman ruins are parking lots.", |
| 7072 | + "Where 'culture' means whatever survived communism and construction.", |
| 7073 | + "Sofia: Proof that being a capital doesn't mean having capital.", |
| 7074 | + "From Sofia? Your city's biggest achievement is having a mountain nearby to escape to.", |
| 7075 | + ], |
| 7076 | + plovdiv: [ |
| 7077 | + "Plovdiv? Europe's oldest city that peaked 2000 years ago.", |
| 7078 | + "From Plovdiv? How's living in Sofia's more historic, less relevant sibling?", |
| 7079 | + "Plovdiv: Where the Roman theater is in better shape than the economy.", |
| 7080 | + "Oh, Plovdiv? The city that was Capital of Culture and nobody noticed.", |
| 7081 | + "Plovdiv: Where everyone's an artist because real jobs don't exist.", |
| 7082 | + "From Plovdiv? Let me guess, you tell tourists it's better than Sofia.", |
| 7083 | + "Plovdiv: The only city where ancient history is the only industry.", |
| 7084 | + "Where 'revival' architecture means copying what worked 200 years ago.", |
| 7085 | + "Plovdiv: Proof that being old doesn't mean being important.", |
| 7086 | + "From Plovdiv? Your city's biggest achievement was hosting events nobody attended.", |
| 7087 | + ], |
| 7088 | + }, |
| 7089 | + // CROATIA |
| 7090 | + croatia: { |
| 7091 | + generic: [ |
| 7092 | + "Croatia? Where the coastline is gorgeous but the economy is seasick.", |
| 7093 | + "From Croatia? How's that EU membership working with those EU prices and Balkan wages?", |
| 7094 | + "Croatia: Where everyone's a tour guide three months a year and unemployed the other nine.", |
| 7095 | + "Oh, Croatia? The country that's just Italy's cheaper vacation knockoff.", |
| 7096 | + "Croatia: Where Game of Thrones filmed because it already looked post-apocalyptic.", |
| 7097 | + "From Croatia? Let me guess, you're renting your apartment to tourists and living with parents.", |
| 7098 | + "Croatia: The only country where the islands have more jobs than the mainland.", |
| 7099 | + "Where 'independence' meant swapping Yugoslav dysfunction for EU bureaucracy.", |
| 7100 | + "Croatia: Proof that beautiful beaches can't feed families.", |
| 7101 | + "From Croatia? Your country's biggest export is young people to Ireland and Germany.", |
| 7102 | + "Croatia: Where everyone claims Tesla but can't keep the lights on.", |
| 7103 | + "The country where nationalism is stronger than the economy.", |
| 7104 | + "Croatia: Where the war ended but the mentality didn't.", |
| 7105 | + "From Croatia? You definitely have strong opinions about Serbia and weak job prospects.", |
| 7106 | + "Croatia: Because someone had to make Bosnia look functional.", |
| 7107 | + ], |
| 7108 | + zagreb: [ |
| 7109 | + "Zagreb? Where the Christmas market is more famous than actual achievements.", |
| 7110 | + "From Zagreb? How's living in a capital that tourists skip for the coast?", |
| 7111 | + "Zagreb: Where everyone's bitter about not being on the seaside.", |
| 7112 | + "Oh, Zagreb? The city that's just Vienna's poorest, smallest cousin.", |
| 7113 | + "Zagreb: Where the earthquake did urban planning better than the government.", |
| 7114 | + "From Zagreb? Let me guess, you work in tourism but never see tourists.", |
| 7115 | + "Zagreb: The only capital where the main square is the only square that matters.", |
| 7116 | + "Where 'culture' means copying whatever Austria did 50 years ago.", |
| 7117 | + "Zagreb: Proof that being a capital doesn't mean being visited.", |
| 7118 | + "From Zagreb? Your city's biggest achievement is that Christmas market everyone forgets by January.", |
| 7119 | + ], |
| 7120 | + split: [ |
| 7121 | + "Split? Where Diocletian's Palace is in better shape than the local economy.", |
| 7122 | + "From Split? How's living in a tourist theme park?", |
| 7123 | + "Split: Where locals can't afford to live because of Airbnb.", |
| 7124 | + "Oh, Split? The city that's just an ancient palace turned into apartment rentals.", |
| 7125 | + "Split: Where everyone's either serving tourists or resenting them.", |
| 7126 | + "From Split? Let me guess, you avoid the old town from June to September.", |
| 7127 | + "Split: The only city where Roman ruins have better infrastructure than modern buildings.", |
| 7128 | + "Where 'culture' is performed hourly for cruise ship passengers.", |
| 7129 | + "Split: Proof that history doesn't pay contemporary bills.", |
| 7130 | + "From Split? Your city's biggest achievement is convincing people Diocletian's basement is worth visiting.", |
| 7131 | + ], |
| 7132 | + dubrovnik: [ |
| 7133 | + "Dubrovnik? King's Landing for people who think Croatia is a Game of Thrones set.", |
| 7134 | + "From Dubrovnik? How's living in Europe's most expensive medieval theme park?", |
| 7135 | + "Dubrovnik: Where locals are extras in their own city.", |
| 7136 | + "Oh, Dubrovnik? The city that sold its soul to HBO and cruise ships.", |
| 7137 | + "Dubrovnik: Where the walls protected against Venetians but not against tourists.", |
| 7138 | + "From Dubrovnik? Let me guess, you can't afford to live within the walls.", |
| 7139 | + "Dubrovnik: The only city where fictional TV history is more profitable than real history.", |
| 7140 | + "Where 'authentic' costs extra and locals can't afford it.", |
| 7141 | + "Dubrovnik: Proof that being beautiful is a curse if you're poor.", |
| 7142 | + "From Dubrovnik? Your city's biggest achievement is being destroyed by tourism while claiming to preserve heritage.", |
| 7143 | + ], |
| 7144 | + }, |
| 7145 | + |
| 7146 | + // SERBIA |
| 7147 | + serbia: { |
| 7148 | + generic: [ |
| 7149 | + "Serbia? Where the 90s never ended and neither did the grievances.", |
| 7150 | + "From Serbia? How's that eternal victim complex working for EU membership?", |
| 7151 | + "Serbia: Where everyone's still fighting wars that ended decades ago.", |
| 7152 | + "Oh, Serbia? The country that's just Russia's mini-me in the Balkans.", |
| 7153 | + "Serbia: Where nationalism is the only growth industry.", |
| 7154 | + "From Serbia? Let me guess, Kosovo is Serbia and you'll tell everyone.", |
| 7155 | + "Serbia: The only country where losing wars is part of the national identity.", |
| 7156 | + "Where 'progress' means accepting you're not getting Kosovo back.", |
| 7157 | + "Serbia: Proof that being stubborn doesn't mean being right.", |
| 7158 | + "From Serbia? Your country's biggest export is war criminals and basketball players.", |
| 7159 | + "Serbia: Where the past is more alive than the economy.", |
| 7160 | + "The country where everyone's Orthodox but acts like pagans.", |
| 7161 | + "Serbia: Where the EU keeps you at arm's length for good reasons.", |
| 7162 | + "From Serbia? You definitely have strong opinions about 1389 like it was yesterday.", |
| 7163 | + "Serbia: Because someone had to make the Balkans complicated.", |
| 7164 | + ], |
| 7165 | + belgrade: [ |
| 7166 | + "Belgrade? Where the nightlife is better than the daylife.", |
| 7167 | + "From Belgrade? How's living at the crossroads of nothing and nowhere?", |
| 7168 | + "Belgrade: Where every building tells a story of who bombed it.", |
| 7169 | + "Oh, Belgrade? The city that's been destroyed 40 times and it shows.", |
| 7170 | + "Belgrade: Where everyone parties because tomorrow might be another war.", |
| 7171 | + "From Belgrade? Let me guess, you're in IT or a club at 4 AM.", |
| 7172 | + "Belgrade: The only capital where floating clubs are more stable than the government.", |
| 7173 | + "Where 'culture' means staying up until 6 AM.", |
| 7174 | + "Belgrade: Proof that good nightlife can't fix daytime problems.", |
| 7175 | + "From Belgrade? Your city's biggest achievement is surviving another decade.", |
| 7176 | + ], |
| 7177 | + novi_sad: [ |
| 7178 | + "Novi Sad? Belgrade's boring younger sibling with a fortress.", |
| 7179 | + "From Novi Sad? How's being Serbia's 'cultural capital' with no culture?", |
| 7180 | + "Novi Sad: Where EXIT festival is the only entrance to relevance.", |
| 7181 | + "Oh, Novi Sad? The city that's just Petrovaradin fortress and wishful thinking.", |
| 7182 | + "Novi Sad: Where everyone's more civilized but equally unemployed.", |
| 7183 | + "From Novi Sad? Let me guess, you're proud you're not Belgrade.", |
| 7184 | + "Novi Sad: The only city where being bombed was the most exciting thing that happened.", |
| 7185 | + "Where 'diversity' means Serbs and Hungarians ignoring each other.", |
| 7186 | + "Novi Sad: Proof that being cultured doesn't pay bills.", |
| 7187 | + "From Novi Sad? Your city's biggest achievement is that music festival everyone forgets exists.", |
| 7188 | + ], |
| 7189 | + }, |
| 7190 | + |
| 7191 | + // LITHUANIA |
| 7192 | + lithuania: { |
| 7193 | + generic: [ |
| 7194 | + "Lithuania? Where the suicide rate competes with the emigration rate.", |
| 7195 | + "From Lithuania? How's being the Baltic state everyone forgets exists?", |
| 7196 | + "Lithuania: Where everyone's grandfather was a partisan and everyone's cousin is in London.", |
| 7197 | + "Oh, Lithuania? The country that's just Poland's depressed little brother.", |
| 7198 | + "Lithuania: Where basketball is religion because God abandoned everything else.", |
| 7199 | + "From Lithuania? Let me guess, you're IT or planning to leave for Norway.", |
| 7200 | + "Lithuania: The only country where depression is a national characteristic.", |
| 7201 | + "Where 'culture' means drinking until you forget you're Lithuanian.", |
| 7202 | + "Lithuania: Proof that independence doesn't guarantee happiness.", |
| 7203 | + "From Lithuania? Your country's biggest export is sadness and construction workers.", |
| 7204 | + "Lithuania: Where the history is tragic and the present isn't much better.", |
| 7205 | + "The country where everyone's Catholic but acts like nihilists.", |
| 7206 | + "Lithuania: Where the winters are long and the hope is short.", |
| 7207 | + "From Lithuania? You definitely have more relatives abroad than at home.", |
| 7208 | + "Lithuania: Because someone had to make Estonia look cheerful.", |
| 7209 | + ], |
| 7210 | + vilnius: [ |
| 7211 | + "Vilnius? Where the old town is pretty but the people are prettier when drunk.", |
| 7212 | + "From Vilnius? How's living in the Baltics' most suicidal capital?", |
| 7213 | + "Vilnius: Where everyone's an artist because real jobs don't exist.", |
| 7214 | + "Oh, Vilnius? The city that's just Riga's less interesting Catholic cousin.", |
| 7215 | + "Vilnius: Where the churches outnumber the reasons to live.", |
| 7216 | + "From Vilnius? Let me guess, you work in a call center or a bar.", |
| 7217 | + "Vilnius: The only capital where UNESCO status can't cure depression.", |
| 7218 | + "Where 'nightlife' means drinking away Soviet memories.", |
| 7219 | + "Vilnius: Proof that being pretty doesn't make you happy.", |
| 7220 | + "From Vilnius? Your city's biggest achievement is being cheap for British stag parties.", |
| 7221 | + ], |
| 7222 | + kaunas: [ |
| 7223 | + "Kaunas? Lithuania's second city that wishes it was first.", |
| 7224 | + "From Kaunas? How's being the temporary capital nobody remembers?", |
| 7225 | + "Kaunas: Where the interwar architecture is the only interesting thing.", |
| 7226 | + "Oh, Kaunas? The city that's just Vilnius without the tourists.", |
| 7227 | + "Kaunas: Where everyone's bitter about not being the capital anymore.", |
| 7228 | + "From Kaunas? Let me guess, you're a student or unemployed.", |
| 7229 | + "Kaunas: The only city where being European Capital of Culture was the peak.", |
| 7230 | + "Where 'culture' means whatever Vilnius didn't want.", |
| 7231 | + "Kaunas: Proof that being historical doesn't mean being relevant.", |
| 7232 | + "From Kaunas? Your city's biggest achievement was being capital for 20 years.", |
| 7233 | + ], |
| 7234 | + }, |
| 6261 | 7235 | }; |